Several months ago a woman wrote to me about her problems with getting Urinary Tract Infections (UTIs) after sex and I answered to the best of my ability in this blog entry. This is actually a relatively common problem that is often asked of sex educators and doctors. One woman who experiences this problem recently wrote in to Betty Dodson and Carlin Ross saying that she's found the solution. She highly recommends Waterfall D-Mannose. So for those of you out there who are still having a difficult time with UTIs, this might be your answer. Check it out, do the research, and maybe give it a try. I'd love to hear from anyone who has tried this stuff. Does it really work?
Sunday, December 28, 2008
Thursday, December 25, 2008
Slipping Out
Dear Garnet Joyce,
I am a gay male who is having sex (safe of course) with another man. I am on the receiving end of the sex, if you understand. When I am having anal sex with my guy, he frequently slips out. Why does this happen? It happens a few times each session. Are there any ways I can prevent this from happening?
I'd say that this other man that you're having sex with sounds like he thinks his dick is longer than it is. So he keeps pulling out further than he should and pops out. The best solution I can give you is to talk to him about making his thrusts a bit on the shorter side and maybe deeper (but only if deeper feels good for you). If he's new to this or you're new to having sex together it may take a bit for you guys to get the swing of things, but after some practice it will go more smoothly. And I'm glad to hear you're using protection!
Sunday, December 14, 2008
Homophobia and the Media
I really enjoy watching the media tackle homophobia (especially since most of the time it seems to just support the status quo) and here are two recent examples that made me happy.
Staff writer at the Washington Post, Hank Stuever, tackles the question "Why can't a kiss just be a kiss?". It is about the obsession of asking straight male actors about their onscreen gay kisses and their often homophobic responses. Apparently a straight man kissing another man is so disgusting that it makes actors oscar worthy if they do it.
And here is another example that just ... well tickled me pink. I mean I've always loved John Stewart, but now I have an even bigger reason to love him. Watch as he asks Mike Huckabee about same-sex marriage.
Awesome, right?
Monday, December 1, 2008
Aneros Helix
I found a great new male reviewer for AskGarnet.com and I'm sooo happy about it! His name is Clix and he is very open minded sexually, a great writer, and takes fantastic pictures of cute naked girls. So he will be reviewing all those items which I cannot. His first task was the Aneros Helix and he was very up to the challenge! Read on to find out what he thought.
To the average American male, the idea of, to be crass, shoving something up your ass for sexual pleasure is pretty much out of the question. Much to the benefit of my range of erotic expression and capacity for pleasure, I am not the average American male.
When the opportunity to write a review of the Aneros Helix came up, I couldn't have been more excited. I have for, as long as I can remember, been a proponent of anal/prostate stimulation, and I had heard nothing but amazing things about the toy. Without a bit of exaggeration, I can say the moment the package arrived, I tore it open, grabbed my trusty bottle of Eros, and got to work.
The shape of the Helix is rather striking, and at a glance you can tell it means business. The plastic construction is smooth enough, and has a refined finish with none of the icky seams that plague some of the cheaper varieties of toys on the market. Despite being pretty familiar with the operation of most sex toys, I read the instructions on the box. The basic gist of the guide was, “relax, lubricate, insert, relax more, work muscles while relaxing.” Ok... so... I got it... relax... So I followed the instructions, mostly. I went to my whacking sanctuary, lubricated it, and slid it into place, making sure the perineum stimulator nudged up nicely, and started flexing my PC muscles.
According to many forums, and much of the literature I'd read, the Aneros line of toys is supposed to allow for the elusive hands free orgasm for males. I experimented for about a half-hour with flexing at different frequencies and strengths, and then relinquishing control to natural reflexes. Given enough patience, I was sure that I could achieve it, but eagerness was the word of the moment so I quickly let my hands in on the action. Normally a good whack will take me 20-30 minutes to finish. Not this time. About 5 minutes (judging by the fact that a single track on my EDM playlist had gone by) passed, and I was already feeling the tell-tale twitches. Not since first discovering auto-eroticism do I remember climaxing so fast or with such force, and I'm not sure I've ever ejaculated with the volume I achieved. Even before I came, I noticed I was dribbling pre-cum like a broken faucet loses water, but even that was nothing compared to the torrents I blasted.
Over the next week of testing, I was delighted to find that my new tool, unlike regular masturbation, did not become less fun or impressive with each usage, but rather, the more I learned to control it, the more useful and powerful it became. Sadly, I never found the hands free orgasm, but I was able to get myself almost to the point of no return several times and it would take less than 5 minutes with added penile stimulation to achieve.
As far as INTRApersonal activities go, the Helix proved it was more than formidable, but it also managed to shine when used with a partner. Overcoming initial apprehension with a partner who may be less open minded than a person willing to try the helix may take some effort, but is well worth it. Having the additional sensory input driving you will definitely have an impact on your performance. Aneros now has two official fans in this household.
All told the helix has nothing but good points to remark on. The size is enough to feel filling, but not large enough to be intimidating to anal amateurs. The only prohibitive factor I can possibly see in the helix is the retail price which hovers around $75. Some may see this as a bit of a high price for a toy that doesn't vibrate, light up, or cook you breakfast. It is, with complete certainty I assure you, worth every dollar. Pick one up as soon as possible, your pent up sexual energy that previously had no way to be realized will thank you.