Sunday, July 13, 2008

Fisting

First off, I want to thank dep for the wonderful new site design. He did a great job and I hope you all enjoy it. I've also added a whole bunch of new recommendations along the side as well as a best of. Check them out and let me know if you think any other entries should be put in the best of section.

Secondly, in case you haven't noticed, you can now reach my website simply by going to askgarnet.com. There is no longer a need to type in the blogspot part. It will redirect you. Eventually I may move everything over to the new URL.

And now on to a new question.

What's a good way to introduce fisting? How do you start? What's the best lube to use? Any techniques that are good for the novice?

Fisting is not something to be entered into lightly (no pun intended). Both parties should really think about how comfortable they are with an entire hand inside of themselves or the other person as well as whether or not they think it is actually possible. Some people just can't get that much inside no matter how much they're warmed up first. And some people are just fine until they look down and see just how much is inside of them and start to freak out.

Things you will absolutely need in order to fist or be fisted:

1. Trust - You absolutely have to be able to trust each other because this is a sexual act that can really surprise you and possibly really hurt you. I've heard a lot of people say that they are amazed at the amount of emotion that fisting brings out in them. And lets face it, there's also the possibility of physical damage as well if precautions aren't made and if things go too fast.

2. Communication - As with any sexual exchange communication is extremely important. But when you start entering into sexual acts that can really take a lot of patience and understanding between partners communication becomes all that much more important. If you can't discuss what feels good with each other you definitely should not try fisting.

3. Warming up - Lets face it, a fist is a lot to take for anyone. So warm up! If you're fisting a vagina then you can easily just use fingers. Start with one or two fingers and then add one a little at a time when she is ready. Dildos can also be used. If you are warming up an ass to be fisted I highly recommend using butt plugs to warm it up. A lot of in and out motions will wear the ass out and you'll never get that fist in there. Instead use butt plugs of varying sizes to warm up. You can start off with something small like Little Flirt and work your way up to something like the Severin with several sizes in between.

4. Lube - Lots and lots of thick lube. I suggest something like Maximus which has a very thick consistency and lasts a good long time.

5. Gloves - Either latex or nitrile gloves depending on what you prefer and if either of you have a latex allergy. These are a great way to make your sex safer especially when stressing body parts out when fisting. They are absolutely necessary if you will be fisting an ass and will make the experience more comfortable for both of you.

Something to also keep in mind about fisting is that it might not happen the first time you try. Be patient and try not to be disappointed. It is something you should really work up to and allow a lot of time for. And if you or your partner start to feel uncomfortable, stop. You can always try again later if you want to.

And once again: communication, communication, communication. Start communicating before your clothes ever come off. Talk about your expectations and your fears. Communicate during. Talk about what feels good, what doesn't, your emotions. Communicate afterward. Talk about what worked and what didn't, what you learned for next time, and if there will even be a next time.

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